Update

★MAY@
Class - A3
Title - Can't hide the beating heart
Outruns - 770+
Mileage - 32, 786km
Current loop - 8th
Ghosts - 504+


Reflections
It was a mistake, really. Now to rework my plans.

Racing? Now it's back to basics for me. It's time to begin a new chapter, it's time to relearn my car once more.

But first, I must step on the brakes..A moment frozen in time, to clear my mind. Then I will take off again. I will run again.

He has my beating heart now, and damn, I will make sure he becomes good.

Passion Evolved v2

I can't live without it, but too much of it makes my head ache. I need it once in a while to 'recharge' myself, but too much of it...can kill me

Update

★MAY@
Class - A6
Title - Can't hide the beating heart
Outruns - 710++
Mileage - 30, 897km
Current loop - 7th
Ghosts - 503+

Reflections
I haven't been doing updates. Kind of losing my will/passion(?) to play Wangan. Haixx. I feel that now I will be slowing down on Wangan..try get my life back in order first.

Can't hide the beating heart..where is my beating heart now?? So many problems, so little time.

Just finish this loop, and get my stars to 800...and then I can rest. Rest, and when I come back my heart will be beating once more.

Perseverance

Perseverence

Description:

+125% Mana Regeneration

+5 HP/Sec Regeneration

+10 Damage

Activated Ability (0 mana, 0 cooldown): Turns Perseverence back into Ring of Health and Void Stone
Recipe: Ring of Health (875) + Void Stone (875)

Total Cost: 1750

I MUST PERSEVERE!~

Passion Evolved

"Passion is what makes a person better"

Change of Plans

Reworked my plans a little coz I realised that at my current level, I could get to A3 easily and not use any stars for it. Plus I don't have the skill level to get A2 and A1 with stars.

Probably should rely a bit more on my loops, I guess.

Update

★MAY@
Class - A6
Title - Can't hide the beating heart
Outruns - 617+
Mileage - ??km
Current loop - 7th
Ghosts - 441

Reflections
I think the game with Ah Yue kor and Roxy da jie really opened my eyes? I must not be too kind liao. If they don't mind, then all the more I should go for it. It cost me 2 stars; and I cannot be learning this kind of lesson too late, nor can I afford to not gain stars anymore.

Apart from that, IIRC, 25th April 2008 is another day to be remembered - I'd tried my own settings of Stock Body Kit - Carbon Bonnet with duct - Aero Mirrors - Yokohama TCII - 3D Wing....and found it too heavy..yes, it was close to the feeling of a shaded spec F with my rims, but..there was no.."beautiful traction", no..drifting out nicely for me.

And again, the credit goes to Bear Kor for being inspired by Z1's spec C's settings. Now my settings are as shown above..And I really love it. It goes really fast..the pick up is great..and my god..the feeling is back..

Kors, thank you...da jie, thank you...I love you guys..

~

On a side note, I guess I have a little family within the Wangan group now, and I feel more comforted that I have someone to turn to when I'm down and out in Wangan and life.

Da ge - Bear
Er ge - Ah Yue
San ge - Xiao Mi Feng XD
Si jie - Roxy

Update

★MAY@
Class - A6
Title - Can't hide the beating heart
Outruns - 587
Mileage - 26, 391km
Current loop - 6th
Ghosts - 407+

Reflections
After Kor, Flare and Voltz unshaded my car for me (thank you, guys!), my car is...like, omg, really much faster. The difference is noticeable. It didn't feel like my car anymore - it went fast, but there was none of the grip factor that I was used to.

So much for using "ugly" rims =( I had to change my settings. Now, I'm not using Shotguns le, but the feeling is still missing. I don't feel much when I'm playing.

However, I feel that I've improved, just slightly. Battling Rusco has shown me what 1 week's of training can do to my playstyle, to my mindset. I feel the battle lust calling me now - it's so..scary that I could desire to..play this game so much.

~

I have a more or less "set" plan for running my loops. I can do 1 loop 1 day. If I had 40 days free, I could run finish all my loops. This translates into 40 weeks, since I get 1 day off/week. 40 weeks translates into 10 months. 10 months means I have slightly over 2.5 months to get my stars and Ghosts done in order to complete this project by Mid '09.

You know what? I'll just concentrate on my loops first.

If my Saturdays are half-days, then I'll battle. However, whichever is my free day (Saturday or Sunday) will be kept for loops in the day, battles in the night.

Battle lust? Hell, yeah.

~

What has happened this past week is emotionally draining. I see now that my road to SSS is not only physically tough - as in, the requirements to get SSS: loops, ghosts, stars, outruns, cash, time, effort, endurance etc.. - but it will also be emotionally tough for me. Like what I've confided to Rusco the other night: "I am probably one of the lowest skilled players in Wangan in TRD, if not the lowest. This road for me is doubly hard, because I need to improve myself while going for something only experienced people are going for."

I can't help it if my attitude towards the game and my friends changes - I feel that I'm changing, that I'm (hopefully -.-''') improving. I'm sorry for trying to improve myself and pissing you off at the same time though.

But like what I've said - my road is doubly hard because I'm so accomodating. I must learn to not let anyone put me down, I must learn to endure. If you need someone to trample on, be careful for that someone might just prick you back one day.

And if you hate me and my attitude, come up to me and say it - don't go around slowing my pace. I can't wait for you; if you can't and don't want to improve yourself, don't come and slow me down.

I'm like a spinning top, don't slow me down.

Sacrifices

Sacrifices must be made.

That's what they always say. Why does it ring so true for me?

Have I changed? Have I become more yaya (arrogant for the uneducation Singlish) because I'm trying to better myself? I just don't want people to..mistake my desire to play this game, and excel in it for...arrogance.

Of course it was wrong of me to tell someone off before I even had the proof, but..I have no excuses to make.

I'm afraid to gain the one thing that I'm looking forward to, but lose everything that I have had.

"I was given a great gift. To use this gift, I must lose all happiness, all friends, all life. I might lose him in the process, and sooner or later, I would come to regret accepting this gift - or would I?"

I really don't know. And I can't go to him, because...this is exactly what's pushing us apart.

Tsk

CBox was dying on me and I forgot which login I'd use for this blog's CBox, ended up porting my own personal CBox from my personal blog here.

Oh well.