Change of Body Kit

UGLY. I don't like the 4 lights in front. I changed from stock body kit - because the feeling felt..too light? - to set B.

Set B has stock wing too. I like the feeling. It's slightly more drifty than what I'm used to but a GT wing should fix that.

I'm at around 350 Ghosts wins right now. Think I may do Ghosts to just update my lining, but apart from that, I'll be looping in the day and racing at night - if I ever get a weekday off.

Don't know why I'm feeling so detached from my car. When will I feel for it again?

Update

★MAY@
Class - A9
Title - Can't hide the beating heart
Outruns - 502
Mileage - 20, 104km


Reflections
I completed a loop today. Shaded as it was, I completed it with help from Rave, Ducky and ABC-kun. I'm glad they loved my car =D

Now on my 3rd loop - I will not shade it, so I can get Midnight R OST~

"What's your plan?" A great friend of mine asked me last night.

"Plan? Nothing solid. If I have free time, of course come down and run..but.." I wasn't sure until a few minutes before I started on this post. Now I feel I have a solid plan...

I would:

- Keep my outruns till end of next month.
- Do at least 2 loops by end of next month. Loops will be done solely at Zone X arcades
- Run my Ghosts at Bugis and DBG, as these are the 2 places which have my lvl 10 Ghosts. I will get to 500 Ghost wins by end of May '08

This will see me jump 3 levels by May '08.

Unless I experience a sudden winning streak and end up with 1k stars -.-'''

Sensation

My car feels...wrong. Even after Bear-kor told me about it, and even after I shrugged it off..

...it still feels wrong.

The only thing that I know is wrong with my baby is..it's not fast enough.

Even people are quite..confused..about why I've used Texas Shotgun rims. Even Boss, who once advised me: "Stick to your own setting..dun care what other people say", also said that my setting feels weird.

Then again, I am a weird person. Why did I say "person" instead of girl? Because there are some times when I feel like a guy; physically I am a girl, but sometimes (well, most of the time) I don't act like one - and it makes me feel..

..weird.

Calculations

If my calculations at the side panel is correct, then it means I have a long way to go, and I would need a lot of time, effort, money and most importantly, support.

Especially for the loops. My god. When I look at it, I don't know if I should cry or not.

Then there are other things that I cannot lose focus when running for SSS:

1. Time - I've given myself an insane target. The destination is one thing, the journey is another. Will I burn out before I reach this time limit - I will only know when I know my limits, and start pushing them further.

2. Money - If I work x number of hours, and keep my weekends free, and try to always catch the last bus home, and not pay for the cab fare to ______ _______, and loop only my own car..Maybe I'll have enough. And if I leave off tuning my other cars...Maybe, just maybe.

3. Effort - I'm afraid that I will burn out too early too fast. This is probably my biggest fear, as I know how hard I will crash if I do burn out.

4. Support - I can give myself support. I can read books, I can ask questions. Yet the support that I would need most is from Rusco, Bear-kor and those others who are running SSS, or who understand the road to SSS. I fear ridicule too - especially those who come to me and say "SSS is xiong. You cannot make it. You are a girl, you cannot make it" I fear that I would listen, and that I would fail.

Yet I must tell myself that fear of failure is wrong. I would only fear that I would have learnt nothing from this.

Update

★MAY@
Class - B1
Title - It's Stress!
Outruns - 453
Mileage - 18, 026km


Reflections
I played against Boss, SKP and Lousy in one match. It was tough - but it reminds me what I will get in the future.

I also played against *EVO9, GUEST (R34), HK.CS (the slammer nerd) and CK. I am near there, yet I'm so far away. It's so stressful especially when I'm supposed to block this guy that guy..

I am filled with hope, because I can feel my skill rising.

Slam. Slam. Slam.

I can, I will, I must.